Almost Here!

Baby boy #3 is almost here...just 20 more days, give or take. Hopefully, he's more like Jacob and decides to come early because I am SO done being pregnant. I don't know if it's just because of how this boy is sitting or because I'm having them so close together my body never really recovered fully from Jacob, but I am in soo much pain! I can barely walk...each step feels like 100 lb weights are pulling on that area (if you know what I mean). *Hopefully it is just women who read this blog* I can't really stand for more than 30 minutes before I feel like my belly is going to fall off...and I get braxton hicks contractions whether I am standing up, sitting down, or laying down. I'm NEVER comfortable! This did not happen at all with David or Jacob.

So, yeah, I basically want him here now because I want my body back. But at the same time, I'm thinking he can stay in there as long as he wants because I'm not ready to have a newborn again. I get very overwhelmed at least once a week because I just don't think I can handle everything, especially since the house is not how I want it to be. But I can only really do one thing a day towards it before I feel completely exhausted and most of those things consist of doing the dishes, laundry, or picking up toys. Things that never really go away...so we still have boxes every where and I hate it!

Sorry, I'm venting, but I've noticed that when I get stressed I take it out on my family, which puts everyone in bad moods, so I'm trying to find new ways to release this frustration. We will see if it works...

I've been having really weird dreams, but very easy to break down and figure out. The gist of them...something is happening that I'm not prepared for and I start freaking out. The real life problem- I feel very unprepared for this baby and I'm freaking out! haha I'm sure every mother feels this way too right before their baby arrives because they know it's seriously going to change their lives forever...but for some reason, knowing that everyone experiences it doesn't really make me feel any better either.

And secrets confessed...I know how to feel better too. I know I need to turn to Heavenly Father for help. Why I haven't done so or been doing so is beyond me...it's stupid really, a very simple solution but very hard to execute. So this is my goal...and here's to a better, less stressful, tomorrow!